The Big Whinge

Brown-nosers have feelings too

There's one in every office. It's an office held without thanks in every culture.

Nope, it ain't easy being a brown-noser. If you are really good, people won't even notice what you're doing. But most are unskilled in the art of seamless brown-nosing, so they are easy to spot.

But let's take a closer look at the sacrifices a brown-noser must make:

1. Everyone hates you. They may say it to your face or they may laugh at you behind your back, but be warned, your colleagues are not stupid. They recognise a suckass from the stench of your muzzle.

2. The exhausting surveillance for opportunities to ingratiate yourself - forcing yourself to watch sports you have never heard of so you can have a carefully planned corridor conversation about last weekend's game on Monday morning, laughing like a drain at wretchedly unfunny jokes and applauding abysmal decisions.

3. The loss of dignity - going to sleep every night knowing you have sold out for so long that you're not sure what your own values are anymore...unless you check how the wind is blowing first. It's hard to sit up straight when you don't have a spine, much less your own opinion. You crave and crave for your masters to bestow you a nickname - a sure sign of acceptance in The Golden Circle, of course - even "Serf" has a nice ring to it. Sounds summery.

4. The underlying fear that one day the people who champion you will no longer be around. Best get your paws on the bitumen quick-smart and sniff out which way your new master is beckoning.

So, not as easy as it looks, eh? While by no means condoning the career-making choices of brown-nosers, spare a bit of pity (or derision...they'll take it, they're not too proud) for those whose entire life is based on the relentless search for approval from Important People.

posted by Yarravillean @ 8:49 pm